Attractive?

Do you believe people when they say they find you attractive?

Voted "yes" and "it makes me nervous".

It's easy to tell when this particular question is answered falsely.

Quote: Face

Voted "yes" and "it makes me nervous".

I understand the nervous part.

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It's easy to tell when this particular question is answered falsely.

How do you tell?

Quote: Nareed

I understand the nervous part.

But do you understand why? Even when I know it's a genuine compliment, it still makes me edgy. I always found that weird.

Quote: Nareed

How do you tell?

Some of it's situational. But a good one is inflection. Fake compliments have an upwards inflection at the end of the sentence. The voice is also ever so slightly higher pitched, kind of like one was talking to a dog, only maybe not as severe. Genuine compliments come out naturally, or maybe even in a deeper pitch, depending how much seriousness one wants to impart on the compliment.

Think of your own speech. Someone just cooked you something (my potato craps, for instance =p). I apologize in case you don't like them. You tell me "No, they were good". Think of how you would say it if they were gross but you wanted to save my feelings, vs how you would say it if you found them as amazing as I do. The same way you "fake it" is the same way everyone else fakes it.

Quote: Face

But do you understand why? Even when I know it's a genuine compliment, it still makes me edgy. I always found that weird.

It's not weird. If you were used to it,
you would ignore it. When you seldom
hear it, your first response is 'what
does this person want from me', that
they have to give me a compliment.

Quote: Face

But do you understand why?

In my case, I do. All too often there is some unwanted attention along with it. When it comes with a truckload of flattery, I suspect some ulterior motive.

Lastly, I'm really antsy when a man who finds me attractive doesn't know I'm transgender.

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Some of it's situational. But a good one is inflection.

I think i misunderstood what question you were referring to. I thought you said the answer to the poll question could easily be told to be true or not.

Quote:

I apologize in case you don't like them. You tell me "No, they were good".

You're not supposed to tell a cook their food is bad. Not to your liking, sure, but never bad.


I'm reminded of a joke about a man suffering from chronic foot in mouth. At the end of a dinner party he tells the hostess "The food was delicious. What there was of it." The hostess expression lets him know he's blown it, so he quickly says "Oh, there was plenty of food. Such as it was."

Quote: Nareed

I think i misunderstood what question you were referring to. I thought you said the answer to the poll question could easily be told to be true or not.

I think that's what I meant lol. What I'm saying is, if someone tells me I'm attractive, yes, I can usually tell if it's sincere and I believe them. The way I can tell (to answer your follow up) is largely situational (like, if I make a compliment-fishing complaint and they tell me I am, it's fake), but voice inflection is a great tell for the reasons I listed.

It hasn't happened to me yet, but if it did, I wouldn't believe it.

Maybe Nareed or someone else knows a story like so: Cosmetic alteration possibilities reach the point where you can actually look exactly the way you want. (body and face) without any shortcomings.

My first assumption is, no not everyone would pick the same look. But what would happen with the typical selection process? Would it go to other traits completely, beauty or attractiveness being made irrelevant no one would really be picked for appearance since you could be want you want.

Quote: Wizard

It hasn't happened to me yet, but if it did, I wouldn't believe it.

It happened to me a couple times
when I was younger. I always wrote
it off to ignorance. I've had lots of
people say I was smart. Well, duh..